Never around when you need one

Posted on Tue Mar 18th, 2025 @ 2:01pm by Commander Alex Flynn & Chaplain Lucreavus Palu & Freddie

1,146 words; about a 6 minute read

Mission: The Serpent's Tooth [3]
Location: Freddie's, Civilian Sector
Timeline: 2000 - MD04

Alex had gone everywhere she thought a priest might go, having found his unattended combadge in the holographic multifaith chamber, currently appointed in the style of the Romulan Fury-cults.

Finally, having surrendered after two hours of searching, she went into Freddie's, deciding a pint was a better option. As she entered, she saw a larger than expected throng of Klingons at one of the corner game tables, indeed there were a number of Klingons throughout the space, as well as a number of miscellaneous others. It was smokey, but the air still tasted fresh. Business was surprisingly booming, though none sat at the bar.

"Commander, darling. Pint?" Freddie asked, having learned her patterns by now.

"Oh yes." Alex said, sitting heavily into one of the bar stools, which extended an unfolding back for her when she selected it on the bar.

"Just a moment, my darling. How goes the executive office?" Freddie asked as he keyed the volume of stout into the replicator.

"I can't find a priest. Bad time to need one." Alex said, taking out her discretion-drone. Freddie's was one of the few venues that allowed smoking, even with the sort of device Alex possessed to make it almost imperceptible to others.

"What kind of priest? I've served a Klingon Warsinger and an ex-Vedek this evening."

"The Starfleet kind. Our Chaplain, Palu." Alex told him, lighting her cigarette. Freddie produced a holographic smoke of his own, which he presented to Alex for her to light.

"Palu. Doesn't ring a bell." Freddie said forthrightly, breathing in a lungful of holographic smoke.

"Oh well. Got a lot of Klingons in." Alex noticed.

"Don't think you're the first to notice. I've been putting some Klingon Opera into the stage rotation, and we make a decent enough bloodwine approximation in-house." Freddie explained with modesty, but an unmistakable level of pride in his venue.

"Love it. Who's on tonight?" Alex asked, checking her LCARS watch, realising the performances on the holostage would be starting soon.

"I'll be doing Aktuh and Milota with my good friends, holographic recreations of Lady Klaytak, and Farinelli." Freddie explained.

There was a sound of great uproar in the corner over Alex's shoulder all of a sudden, there had just been a dramatic reversal of fortunes in whatever game it was they were playing. The sounds of disappointment and defeat were broken by a raspy laughter that made its way to the bar.

Alex flicked the end of her cigarette into the drone, bringing up the Nhuk'leth finals on one of the vacant screens showing views of Dreizhen III's orange-blue sphere.

Next to her, the raspy laughter reached the bar, laying out an armful of winnings in front of him. "Well Freddie, I'm going to have to have something from the top shelf please mate."

Freddie took one of the latinum strips and bit into it with his holographic teeth, before rubbing it on his jacket. "Alright then. But no refunds, vicar." Freddie told the wiry old man.

And what about you young miss, what can I get you?" He asked Flynn.

"Top shelf, hey?" Alex said absently, finally turning away from the brawl that had been underway when the feed of the Nhuk'leth started, having paid only marginal attention to the man's arrival.

"Only the finest, God is smiling on me. One of them anyway. Long island iced tea, please Freddie. With all the finest spirits. And your cheapest cola." The old man said.

She turned back to Freddie to make an order. "Make it two. Good cola though." Alex had to double-take once she realised who it was she was talking to. "Chaplain Palu?"

"In the flesh. How are you my dear?" Palu asked her, more focused on his drink order and winnings than who she was.

"I'm good. I'm particularly good because I've been looking for you. I was hoping we could have a word." Alex said.

"Oh god, what have I done now?" Palu grumbled.

"Well, if I'm not mistaken you're drinking and gambling on duty and you don't have your combadge on your person. But that's not why I'm here, I'm here because we've got a dead body that needs a funeral." Alex said in her most non-threatening tone.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a Vicar, Freddie?" Alex asked the hologram with a not entirely serious tone of annoyance.

"I thought it was just a name. He's the ex-Vedek." Freddie said with a shrug.

"I'm Alex Flynn, by the way. First Officer." Alex told the man.

"Oh, damn shame. Damn shame. Lucreavus Palu. Most just call me Vicar. Can I have one of those?" Palu asked, noticing Flynn's cigarette as Freddie put their drinks down, a pineapple slice garnish on the rim of each.

"Sure." Alex said, offering him her cigarette case and lighter.

"Where was he from, your dead fellow?" Palu asked, taking and lighting one of her cigarettes.

"Betazed. One of the lesser noble houses." Alex explained.

"Betazoid funeral. Christ. So much wailing and smashing of perfectly good glassware." Palu said, rolling his eyes and taking a sip of his drink.

"Fortunately he wasn't traditional. He actually doesn't have any ceremony specified on his will-kit, so I'm hoping we can have something light for his colleagues, more than anything. Maybe torpedo him into the atmosphere of Dreizhen III." Alex said.

"What happened to him?" Freddie asked, surprised he hadn't heard about a death on the grapevine. He loved secrets, and the station staff knew they could trust him with them.

"Tried to read the mind of one of our guests against their will. The result was pretty immediately fatal, probably not even a deliberate act." Alex told them.

"Oh dear. Paracortical feedback aneurysm?" Palu asked.

"No, just... no head anymore. Whole thing exploded. Every cell flew apart at speed No bits, just mist."

Palu let out a chortle he couldn't entirely stifle at the thought, but quickly brought himself under control. "Right. Closed casket then. Alright, when do you need it done?" The Chaplain asked.

"Tomorrow morning I've set some time aside for the whole comms department from 10-1100. I've taken the liberty of booking out the multifaith space." Alex told the Chaplain.

"Yes, good. It shall be done, my dear Commander. Freddie, please hold and count my money, I'm going to win some more before the show starts." Palu said, spinning around to the other side of his seat.

"Oh and Vicar, wear your fucking combadge when you're on duty from now on, yeah?" Alex asked in a way that she hoped was sufficiently light and friendly despite the profanity.

Palu chortled again at that. "Absolutely, ma'am." He said before returning to the gaming table.

Alex smiled at Freddie, she could see he was amused as he served someone else who came up to the bar. She browsed through the menu on the bar's holodisplay.

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